lunedì 15 giugno 2026

Time to reset my brain.

I experienced love for the first time and it went all wrong. It's all my fault.
Recently I did a mistake and now this mistake is creating an aftershock of confusion, anger and numbness. I can't focus, I can't train properly and I'm risking my job. 

I am sorry if I made you suffer.

It's time for me to roll back to who I was months ago. An athlete. Nothing else. I do not deserve love. 

My destiny has already been written: training myself and athletes until I die. 

And now...time to train even if I'm exhausted. Per me.

Good night stupid world of motherfuckers. 








 



 

domenica 14 giugno 2026

Paz!

"Perché il freddo, quello vero, sa essere qui: in fondo al mio cuore di sbarbo".

Massimo Zanardi 

mercoledì 10 giugno 2026

Tuo Per Sempre 🥹

I still think about what I did, and I feel like an absolute idiot. 

Not because I am evil, not because my intentions were bad but because I was blind and insecure in ways that now seem so obvious to me. There are moments when I replay everything in my mind and wonder how someone who loves you as much as I do could have been so foolish.

And then I think about you.

I think about your forgiveness.

I think about your patience.

I think about the fact that after everything, you still chose me.

You still love me.

You still look at me with those beautiful eyes and see something worth keeping and every single time that realization hits me, I feel overwhelmed by how lucky I am.

Because finding true love is basically impossible.

Finding a woman as beautiful as you is impossible.

Finding a soul as kind, gentle, intelligent, passionate, and forgiving as yours is impossible.

Yet somehow, against all probabilities, you are here piccolina mia.

Sometimes I look at your photos and videos and I genuinely struggle to understand how a woman like you exists. You look like something that escaped from a dream, from a painting, from a story written by a poet who had never seen imperfection.

What makes me love you beyond any rationality is...

Your heart.

The way you love.

The way you forgive.

The way you make me want to become a better man.

My beloved piccolina...

I want to wake up next to you.

I want to see your face every morning for the rest of my life.

I want to stand near you, taking your hands in mine, and promising before the world and before eternity that I will love you until my last breath.

I want to call you my wife.

I want a home filled with laughter, little footsteps running through the hallway, and children who have your divine smile and divine eyes.

I want thousands of ordinary moments that would become extraordinary simply because they are shared with you.

And when I imagine eternity, I do not imagine it as a place.

I imagine it as being beside you.

Embracing you. Kissing you. Making love with you.

Resting my forehead against yours.

You are my greatest blessing.

My safest place.

My inspiration.

And if I could choose only one thing to keep from this entire universe, I would choose you.

Every single time.

Forever 🥹🥹🥹💕💓🫂

Ti amo e ti amerò per sempre mia sirenetta 🥹 

venerdì 5 giugno 2026

The Weight I Can Carry

People often assume that strength is a simple thing.

They see the years of gymnastics, calisthenics, martial arts, the calloused hands, the discipline, the injuries endured in silence. They see a man who can lift his own body as if gravity were merely a suggestion. They see a man who has spent a lifetime teaching himself not to surrender.

And perhaps they are right.

I am strong. Extremely strong. 

Yet there is a strange irony hidden inside strength: the strongest battles are often fought where nobody can see them. Many years ago, I stood before a crossroads. One path led toward the Olympics. It was a road paved with certainty, sacrifice, and the possibility of becoming everything the world expects a gifted athlete to become.

The other path was uncertainty itself.

Stories.

Cinema.

Art.

The strange worlds that lived inside my imagination.

I chose the second path.

Even now, there are nights when I wonder whether I made the wrong choice. Nights when I look at my life and feel the cold shadow of failure standing quietly behind me.

I wonder what I could have been.

I wonder what I should have been.

I wonder if somewhere there exists another version of me wearing medals instead of carrying unfinished dreams in a broken industry.

And if I am honest, there is one fear greater than all the others.

The fear that the woman I love (my soulmate Paloma) might look at me one day and see not the man I tried to become, but the man who failed to become something else.

It is a fear I rarely speak aloud.

Because strength teaches you to hide your wounds but love teaches you to reveal them.

The truth is that when I look at her, I do not see the world through the eyes of an athlete, an artist, or a man measuring his worth against old ambitions but I simply see home. I see the person whose happiness matters more to me than my own.

And that realization changes everything.

Because there are moments when she is sad, anxious, overwhelmed, or hurting, and something inside me reacts with a force stronger than any instinct I have ever known.

I have endured pain.

I have endured exhaustion.

I have endured injuries that would make most people quit.

Yet feeling sadness in herself is somehow harder than all of those things combined.

It feels as though the air itself becomes heavier.

As though breathing requires effort.

As though the entirety of my own heart has forgotten how to beat properly until she smiles again.

Perhaps that is what love truly is.

Not fireworks.

Not grand gestures.

Not poetry.

But the strange and terrifying realization that another person's joy has become inseparable from your own.

People speak often about what they would die for.

I think the more meaningful question is what they would live for.

And my answer is simple.

I will live for her.

I will fight for her.

I will cross every ocean, climb every mountain, and walk through every darkness I have ever imagined if it meant keeping her safe.

And if life ever demanded a greater price, I would pay it without hesitation.

Not because I am fearless.

But because some things become more important than fear.

She is one of those things.

Perhaps I never became the Olympian I might have been.

Perhaps some dreams were abandoned along the way.

Perhaps some versions of myself were left behind on roads I did not take.

But when I look at her, I realize something extraordinary.

The greatest achievement of my life was never a medal, a title, a film, or a feat of strength.

It was finding someone whose existence makes me want to become a better man every single day.

And if history remembers me as nothing at all, if every accomplishment fades into dust and every ambition is eventually forgotten, there is one thing I hope remains true:

That she knew, beyond every doubt, that she was loved.

Completely.

Fiercely.

Endlessly.

With every ounce of strength in my body and every fragile piece of my soul.

And if there is any greatness in me at all, it is because loving her to infinity taught me what greatness actually means.

Piccolina mia...ti amo in un modo che spiegare a parole sarebbe impossibile.